A Day In A Life of This Hottie.

HoLa!

2004-07-09T23:57:50Z

Hey everyone...sorry I haven't posted in so long, I've just been super really busy and haven't had any time.....BUT now that I have a spare moment, thought I'd post some new summer pics and let everyone know what I'm up to! Sound good?

OKAY...first off, well....I might be moving to San Luis Obispo to go to this uber kewl community college there...if I dont go there then I'm moving to Nortridge to go to Cal State Northridge....Lets see what else can I tell you..I have a big modeling convention to go to in San Francisco in August.....I'm more excited about that than school! I can't wait....its costing me a friggen fortune to go...but WHO CARES....as long as I try and see if I get picked up DNA models, if I don't get picked up by them, then I just want to get picked up by someone that is willing to sell my look....

Newho..aside from that...I turned 18 *woot woot* and I bought my self some Paul Frank Limited edition Mod-con Accellerator glasses....their my fave! There are only 75 of these glasses around the world and I have the 25th pair ever made! Why I'm on the subject of clothing, I hit that time where its time for me to re-invent my self, I've started working on my new college look....and it consist of a heavy load of Paul Frank clothing and lots of oxfords....a minimal of polos and a ton of Paul Frank accesories (belts, hats, bennies, wrist bands, watcheds, glasses, u name it I have it!)...also I've been buying a lot of my apartments goodies....I've gotten a Paul Frank hat hanger...my friend Bonnie got me a Paul Frank wall clock, my friend Amy got me Paul Frank shower curtains...and I've ordered my Paul Frank bedding.....

SO basically my apartment is going to be full to the top with Paul Frank stuff....cuz well, I am the Paul Frank poster boy..

so...um...heres a couple of pics for ya....heres what I'm looking like these days....

....well those are all the pics I wanna post...hope u guys and gals enjoy them....bye

A little PhOto'S 4 YALL!

2004-04-29T01:33:33Z

Well...I am so tired...I dunno why I'm so exhausted but I am...Hope u guys enjoy the pics...i had fun staring in em...lol bye

DeJa...Who?

2004-04-27T05:55:54Z

..Lately I've been feeling intoxiated by a little pisces I know. I feel drunk on this pisces voice whenever they speak to me....and I feel dazed when ever they say good bye. I've got so many fond memory's with this pisces that I can't help but slip into minor comforts that used to be there...

Its leading into to summer and these last couple of months have been deja vu. I keep living my past through my future. I feel emotions and feelings that have long been stored away...Am I okay...yeah? Am I lost...maybe. I'll be found soon....summer we'll be here and over before I know it. I think what I need is me a new memory beginer. I've dwelled long enough in an idle past...and now I need a vivid and live SOLID FUTURE.

Latley I've had no time for anyone...the web...or my family. I've been taking care of my school prioritys and getting my life on track for my new begginings. I'm sad but happy. I feel like I'm getting ready to begin a life that I've always wanted. All of this senior crap I've been up to is really consuming my life though, I cant wait till school is ova! YIPPIE~

KiZz My ArSe TiM!

2004-02-23T08:37:04Z

You Are a Perfect Lay!

All sorts of guys long to hook up with you, but your standards are set high.

You don't just give it up to anyone, but when you do...they can't get enough of you!

You have a knack for pleasing and receiving, and sex with you is never boring.

Only problem is ~ they all seem to be falling in love with you...

What Kind of Lay Are You?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

Another quiz that deffinatly speaks true to me! DAM THEIR GOOD!

2004-02-19T08:10:20Z

You Are a Sensual Kiss!

Wet, soft, sweet, rough…

For you, kissing is all about how it feels

Whether you're kissing a longtime sweetie or a stranger

It's all about the sensual experience, nothing else!

What Type of Kiss Are You?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

...One MoRe TeSt....that prooves I am NuMbEr 1 Sweet heartwOot WoOt!

2004-02-18T08:38:06Z

Your Bedroom Personality Is Romantic!

For you, sex is an act of love.

What this means:

You wait the longest of all types to have sex.

You've got to be sure that you're in love...

And that your lover is devoted to you.

What your lovers love about you:

You make sex meaningful, passionate, and emotional.

You are caring and gentle throughout the whole act.

And once you have sex, you're likely to stick around for a while.

What your lovers can't stand about you:

For you sex and love are so entertwined...

That good sex can make you too attached.

And bad sex can make you feel unloved.

What's *Your* Bedroom Personality?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

So ThIs QuIz Iz Tottally me!

2004-02-18T08:24:43Z

Your Seduction Stye: "Fantasy Lover"

You know that ideal love that each of us dreams of from childhood? That's you!

Not because you posess all of the ideal characteristics, but because you are a savvy shape shifter.

You have the uncanny ability to detect someone's particular fantasy... and make it you

You inspire each person to be an idealist and passionate, and you make each moment memorable

Even a simple coffee date with you can be the most romantic moment of someone's life

By giving your date exactly what he or she desires, you quickly become the ideal lover.

Your abilities to make dreams come true is so strong, that you are often the love of many people's lives

Your ex's (and even people you have simply met or been friends with) long to be yours

No doubt you are the one others have dreamed of... your biggest challenge is finding *your* dream lover.

What Kind of Seducer Are You?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

wow..this iz so me! When will I find my dream lover?

badtz_maruluv @ 2004-02-16T19:08:00

2004-02-17T03:16:07Z

So wwoww...this weekened was great...the parties between sat and sun were kewl...and kicken it with my loved ones made this weekened pretty DAM fun...I had a great friday night that left me anticipating more to come for the weekend....

I'm hopping that I'll meet up with Ronnie soon...(Nicole..please make it happen)but if it doesn't theres always the newbie addition to the gay crew @ school...although I think I'm starting sum shit between me and one of my friends..and i dont wanna do it because of a dude!

Newho though..I'm out

bye guys and gals

now its getting late...its after 7 and now its me and you...
you and me

and its whatever you want it to be

..but if its up to me....whatever iz whatever....bye again

WhAt Up!

2004-02-12T07:37:28Z

So...right now, I'm chililng and thinking about my day and everything thats happening in my life! IM SO....I dont know how to discribe it! I'm sooooo sleepy! But I dont wanna go to sleep right now..

About an hour ago, I wrote my friends essay for em.....and then I finished my fashion article...

THEN...I started thinking about a certain sumone I might be goin out with soon...for those of you who know who he iz....CONGRATS...and those of u who have know clue...well, I'll tell soon! Newayze, mah trip to Castro was off the charts...i had a blast with my new homies (whom I luv, by the way, WHATZ UP ERIKA AND RACHELLE! I LOVE YALL) Cam was such a great host...once again he suprised me with his fashion and hospitality....so hey cam!

Newayze....I jus dont know what to say....THANX TIARA AND LEASLIE for the poster of Madonna naked...mah mom loved it lol....

I'm so tired..I'm so happy...I'm so, so , so, words can't describe me right now...

BY THE WAY JANET JACKSON IS SEXY AS A MUTHA FU**>>> AND I LUVE HER NO MATTER WHAT! PEOPLE NEED TO GET OVA THE NIPPLE BARRING! EMKAY!

WhEn?

2004-01-21T08:19:43Z

Why do people walk into your life and smile at you...and not just any old smile..but one of those smiles that sends warmth and invites u into something that u know that person doesnt want. When some things should be left alone because of certain circumstances...it always seems that theres the one person that ignores your past history with them..and they choose to let you wrap your life into theres, while hurting you every step of the way. I dunno if ne of this makes sense...but I jus know, that out of the blue today, I caught myself
wanting
               needing
feeling
               touching
obsessing
                       craving
I wanted to kiss...I wanted to hold...I wanted to scream...my emotions rushed and I walked off...my emotions almost got the best of me, so I became an asshole and hid how I felt...saying stupid and meaningless shit so that I could escape from things I want, but I just hide it....
I wear my heart on my sleeve..and brain in my pocket.
I think logically when I dont need to...I think with my heart when I dont have to...and I think with my pants at the WRONG times!
I'm tired of being stupid..

I'm tired of feeling love

I'm tired of being lost

.....when will someone find me, as I continue to try and find myself?

CoLLiSiOn

2004-01-08T08:00:29Z

So Where do we go now..I dont know
Who says its all good... fading fast
And its hard to know what your thinking
When you hide inside your head
Your still promising perfection, affection
Winning to loose....Winning To Loose..Winning TO LOOSE
And its hard to break a habbit (lost inside it)

Who do you love now?
And Its hard to break a habbit (lost inside it)
Who do you love now?

So I have nothing to give you
I'm loosing against the fight with time
Tell Me love is over
Its Silence now
Tell me you dont know what love is
Cuz it wont work out with this sign of love

H~A~T~E

2004-01-06T07:26:43Z

I hate this feeling that I have right now...my emotions are in limbo....I'm so gone right now...I'm lost and I dont know how to explain how I feel...I really dont! I just feel like I have things to sort out but I dont know where to start...HeLp Me

I think I'm going to be an emotional wreck if I dont find what I need...whatever the hell that iz....

YaWn.....

2004-01-03T22:03:30Z

So I guess its time for an update....and when not a better time then now, since my life has a good dose of drama thats jus effected me a tad bit....so...I jus sign off the web @ about 2:30 or well, maybe 2:40 am...sumthing like that...and then my cell phone buzzez at 3 am and I answer...and to my surprise it was Tim...

Total rush of sumthing I've been avoiding for weeks....my emotions get the best of me as I aid him through a problem that he's having..we were on the phone till almost 5...and as I talked to him...he revealed things I didn't know..and things I did know...but either way, hearing them from him hurt and challenged how strong I am of a friend to stick by and listen...'

It sounds like a broken record...my problems with him..but I cant help letting myself get involved when it comes to him....he calls and I run to him...its sick that I let myself get wrapped up everytime...when will I grow the hell up and realize that by letting him let me get envolved with whats happening with him does nothing but make me become this love sick puppy for him that can't commit to nething unless it revolves around him....

His hard time did nothing but strike an uncalm feeling of dezavous(can't remember if thats how u spell it), but all I could do was listen to how upset he was think about how he felt..and how I felt the same way not to long ago...So NoW Im CoNfUsEd....

WhErE dO i BeGiN....I was doing fine without him..but now I've let him back into my life.....

sIgH

2003-12-16T08:11:51Z

Okay...so I'm up right now, and I"m thinking to myself, where am I? I mean seriously..where am I. Phiscally I'm sitting in my chair, but mentally and emotionally I'm jus floating...U know, I'm someone who embarces sex..I love nething that revolves it...not in a porno sorta matter, but in a way where sex iz beautiful....one of my friends recently was raped...and I dont know what to do! I wanna beat the guys azz, but I know she'd would killm e if I did that, I jus feel so bad! How could someone take sumthing as beautiful as sex and make a horrible bond that shouldn't be complete. I feel like shit...I wish I could of been at the party where it happened...I would have never let it happen...Even if I'm not straight, I still have this love for women that isn't breakable. I love women..I love my women freindz....and to hear sumthing tragic happen to them like this, makes me cry...

Even though I feel loved...and I feel like I havta to do so much emotionally for those I love...I swear, I'm on this dam emotional roller coaster..and I'm lonely...I really need some one to be in love with...I wanna help everyone with every lil problem..but I cant concentrate on them if I'm alone. I dunno, I'll figure sumthing out.

Hey HeY HEY!

2003-11-23T20:23:23Z

WOW....So my play ended last night and I stayed out till 4 in the morning...It was so much fun...I was a lil sad cuz I was expecting someone to be there, and I dont wanna quite say who...but it jus woulda meant a ton to me if they would have been there...but its all good, I heard they were in trouble neway! BUT a highlight for the night iz, when i bowed MY PANTS FELL DOWN! I was so embarrassed but it was really funny so its all good! U know what i lov right now, I love Britney Spears, she makes me happy and shes so dam hot lol ne who...nuff said I havta to call the boyfriend bye peeps!

ThE BoYfRiEnD!

2003-11-22T07:57:37Z

OKAY EVERYONE....YES I KNOW! My boyfriend iz loud, obnoxious, and can be a down right ass....but I the moments I spend with him when he's quiet..and sincere...and sweet are the times I like him most. NO one gets to see these tranquil sides of him which is sad cuz he can really be sweet at times, despite waht he displays in the pUbLiC! Well newho, thats all I have to say...lol bye Peoples! LuV Matt

OOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOO La LA La

2003-11-14T23:55:50Z

You have a mysterious kiss. Your partner never
knows what you're going to come up with next;
this creates great excitement and arousal never
knowing what to expect. And it's sure to end
in a kiss as great as your mystery.

What kind of kiss are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

TONIGHT IS MY PLAY!!!

My X CaN eAt cRaP AnD PoOp YEAH U TIM!

2003-11-11T08:52:35Z

Well...Im' not feeling bad but I'm not feeling exactly good either. It seems that everytime I really feel the need to write, its due to my horrific luv life..which has finally seized and stopped, Well, I finally feel like I'm through with Tim. I finally feel like I can bypass him and jus breath without holding my breath with suttle hopes that he missed me. After I poured my heart and emotions to him in this long ass letter that I sent him, he wrote me back with a total fake response that I guess was supposed to sooth me and comfort me...at the moment that I thought I was able to salvage what we had, he bursted my bubble and alerted me to an outing he had with someone else...SO, thats when I realized that Tim never has and never will care about me, he bullshitted his way through are relationship and our short friendship...I asked him to tell me he didn't love me, hoping tht he wouldnt be able to do it, but yet he suprised me, cuz he did it in what appeared to be a world record! He said He didn't love me with such ease that I felt like throwing up right after he did it. Luckily I got away from him before I started to cry, cuz I didnt want him to see me crying, before I left him, I told him are friendship was done with, and that I wanted no more to with him, he said fine, once again, and asked me for one las hug before I walked out of his life....I jus dont get him. I hate the fact that I wasnt enough for him and and I hate the fact that I gave all of me to him. I thought I was selficious when it came to him, but I wasnt selficious I jus cared and loved him, and I always thought that he was the same way with me..but he's not, he doesn't give a sh*t about me, he pretends to care so I'll leave him alone and then plays this I'm so cute role! But Whatever..I'm to grown up for his childish crap and I'm tired of caring about him. All I can hope is that he realizes what he's done..and I pity him if he doesn't, he's allowing me to walk out of his life when im the only one that gives a sh*t about whether he succeds or not...but what do I know, I'm jus the X that wanted to see him happy, even if it wasn't with me...

So ThIs Is LiFe///

2003-11-02T09:38:30Z

Okay..so its about dam time that I wrote..this is for you Tonya..whom said I needed to update! lol...Newayze..well my life isnt in complet shambles..but its not exactly all 2gether to..My gradez currently suck...they could be so much better...I dunno what to do, I'm trying, really I am! BUT its like there all frozen at there current status, and there not moving netime soon! Other wise than my grades sucking...school is kewl..I love all of my friends..I mean I really do! Everyday for the past couple of weeks have been lil *miracles* cuz the love that I've lost, Ive began to gain from everyone around campus....I feel really luved at the moment from all my friendz at school, so Im tottally happy about that! Ya know, this gay thing isnt to bad...I'm happy I came out now..cuz its jus so much fun! I'd recomend being gay to everyone but then our population might suffer..hahaha...OMG...Ya wanna know sumthing great??? Kylie Minogues new CD comes out, and I'm so excited..okay it doesnt come out till Febuary..but I'm still super excited! But newho..I'm gonna go now...I'll write some more later..bye

:sigh:

2003-10-04T01:11:03Z

Well...I'm doin a lil better, as a matter a fact..I doin a whole lot better...2day..I dont know what happened...but I jus felt really loved by my friendz 2day..when I was walking in the halls..I realized that I know a lot of people that I truelly care about...I had a blast 2day...and I jus couldn't stop smiling...I have a ton more to write..but I think I'll do it later..right now I'm feeling undescribable..I feel so alive and yet so down tempo...I'm just here...

How I'm feeling a lil pass 12 a.m.!

2003-10-02T07:32:20Z

OKAY!!! I know its been a long little while since I've posted...and I probably wouldn't have even thought to post if it wouldn't have been for Ashley to request it...SO, lol....I guess I'll write a lil sumting about my life..at the moment...Well, its a lil pass 12 a.m. right now, and I'm up thinking about how I've screwed up my life in one big wop...U ever go through sumthing thats so traumatizing for you, that u can't shake it? No matter what you do to over-ride whats happened, life doesn't jus erase what happened, its always there. Lately school has been great, I got the part I wanted in the school play, I've got a lot of great friends who seem to care about me, and I'm almost feeling complete. Umm, well, I wasn't going to post this..but, then again, I thought why not...he probably wont read it...I hate to go on about stuff that shouldn't bother me...but deep down inside it does bother me. Tim and I aren't friends anymore, it was a choice that I made on my own, because I knew deep down inside I was tired of him dismissing me as if he didn't care about me at all. Everyday I watch him give more and more of himself to his new friends and I'd bight my lip till the point that it felt like it was going to explode, while my eyes began to tear up because I can't handle watching him give away his emotions as if they mean nothing, I remeber when him and I were 2gether, I had to work to recieve his emotions and see how he feels, but now he just gives them away with out a care. I know it sounds stupid for me to feel this way, and I probably sound petty and stupid 'cuz it looks as if I can't move on, but thats not it at all. The fact of the matter is, is that I care about him. And I always will. And its hurts because I know he doesn't care about me the way I care about him. Whenever I've confronted him about it, he's just acted as if I was krazy for even implying that he didn't care about me, but its like, HELLO, how can u say u care about me, when u do the things u do! I just can't deal with it anymore...Everyday has become a new challenge for me, because I want to just go up to him, and say "Tim, I miss you and I love you, come back to me"...I want a moment like that so bad!!!! BUT I know it wont happen, and I know that it might be best that it doesn't happen, cuz how can I trust what he says anymore...all of the most sincere things he's ever told me are normally never true because he finds someway to bypass them...and I jus feel like I'll never be enough for him or anyone at this point. I hate to be dramatic and drama queenish, but I dont know how else to react anymore....I dont even feel as if I know who I am right now...I'm just lost and waiting for him to find me....but the truth of the matter is..is that, he'll probably never find me...he'll jus leave me here waiting cuz thats how he is...

WhAt MoViE RoMaNcE iz My LiFe?

2003-08-24T05:56:08Z

Your romance is more of a love that needs to bloom
within, just like Hedwig of Hedwig and the
Angry Inch. The film features an East German
transsexual who is seeking her "other
half" after constant betrayal. You must
love yourself before you can need another.
You're starting to realize this, along with the
fact that you don't need a significant other to
be a complete person. Your "other
half" has been inside you all along.

What Romance Movie Best Represents Your Love Life?
brought to you by Quizilla

Hmm, well I like the movie result, but the fact of the matter is, is that I need love from someone else. I feel lost with out it! I'm curious to whats gonna happen between me and Tim. Although were trying to remain friends, life between us is so confusing. I jus don't know whats gonna happen nemore...nothing but friends for as long as we know each other, but maybe I do want more, even, though he doesn't, and he'll never understand that, and no matter what, I wont be getting my way this time. AND life JUST SUX ASS! ::sigh:: Okay, well, I'm feeling a lil better. phew! I can stop writing now.

My FaVe KiSs

2003-08-22T05:16:13Z

Sweet Kisses are powerful, delightful, and satisfying when done right. Tasteful like cotton-candy, readable like a book, I love the kisses that a4e like novels.....the kisses that are suggested in a Borders top 10 reading list. I like kisses that are slow and arouse tears in my eyes that trail down my face because of the joy I feel. I like kisses that freeze my senses and unlock my feelings to break the ice melting are hearts into one.....

Well I wrote that about a week ago... I miss kisses

HmMmMm....

2003-08-20T16:05:19Z

Well, hey u guys & gals out there! Ya know, I jus don't know whats wrong with me. I'm feeling sorta deppressed and I know why, but its just that I know I can't fix it, so why do I even attempt. Once again, I put myself in a situation that I shouldn't have and now its left me confused and wondering what on earth am I going to do with myself. I hate feeling like this. Cuz I jus feel so helpless....but ne*wayze, Im going to go now....so I can read Tommy's Tale.

Am I ThE DoMiNaTrIx TYPE?

2003-08-15T02:03:00Z

Well hey, I decided to add another entry from my journal of sexual entries, lol so newayze umm I gonna type it now...but first I havta say that this is tottally fictional emmkay? Its not real, I made it up! okay? Here goes nuthing...OH this one has explicit language fair warning, but its not that bad emmkay?

How I feel in leather is undescribable because my thoughts are dominated by the skin of an animal that taps into my pours, my emotions, and my senses. I become savage to what tender touch is and I choose to express my love in movements w/forgotten love...making love becomes one vile word...need I write the explicit word...why write it...we all say it, know it....and sumtimes do it.
But not me, not unless I'm in leather.
Somthing about being wrapped up and concealed in an aniamls remains, makes me forget my human ways..what ounce had feeling is replaced by thoughts of raw touches and raunchy actions. Scrathed backs, teary eyes, and tattered skin.... am I sick or demented because of what lingers from the touch of leather, no I'm just being dominated. While I dominate my other half, who's being domintated?
I want to claim that I'm the dominatrix...that I fu-fill my lovers wishes of lust through pain..but the truth speaks when I look in the mirror that reveals I'm not the dominent because my leather dominates me. My actions are controlled by a disguise to what and who I am. The leather is what allows me to dominate the way I do. In a sense, I can never let leather make love to me like silk or satin sheets, because the touch of leather doesn't love, it FU**S. Leather FU**S me.
The End

Okay, well hahaha, if u didn't like of ne of my story, u had to like the ending lol, thats the best part...neway, I g/g I'll talk to you all later bye.